(at a.lily's house on the 16th)
the minute i entered the house....
a.kiah : sik nampak kurus pun...
nina : ah? mena ka?
shit ive lost like 20kilos already and u dont see it? - in my mind la...
but i still managed to crack a smile. but then suddenly when i went to send some stuff to her the next day she was like...
a.kiah : eee...kurus kitak, nina oh? *she smiled*
nina : eyh? sekdala...ntah.
aiyer...wussup with this lady? so fickle kah? or just being nice to me?
im so confused...- playing in my mind again.
was depressed for a minute when she told me i dont look like ive lost any weight. but there goes my brother saying...
boy : iboh dgr bah cakap nya. a.kiah bah. palak sik betul sikit. *he laughed*
and i just *sigh* and didnt say anything till we get home that evening.
many things ran in my brain...doing flip flop, mind tricks to me. and i was paranoid of how i look. and also not to forget i sleep in depression that evening. but i can still hear my mom's conversation with my dad on sunday night.
mama : pa, kiah told something to our daughter.
appa : what?
mama : she said she didnt look like she lost any weight. nina was so depressed.
she still is thou.
appa : how u know?
mama : boy la madah...sapa gik?
that was it i heard...didnt hear anything else as i lay on their bed that night. pretending to be fast asleep that later on i actually did feel asleep. till the time came to send my dad to the airport later that night. so i didnt say much that day. and not till today. im avoiding to see ppl. only close friends. suddenly all the ugliness i feel comes back.
aiyah i was so happy with myself until that statement. stupid. but still am. in smaller proportion. *gRin*
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