AWAITING

I'll be leaving in an hours time from the clock ticking right here in front of me. Tick Tock Tick Tock. To wait for the time to finally arrive is one boring section of my life today. I am not excited nor sad to go for this trip. My feelings are blunt and undescribable. What should i do? What should i feel? What should i fear? What should i pray? Everything is crumpled in this head of mine. People may say i am an emotional fucker but i AM. What can i do? Its just plain old NiNa. Known as the emotional stalk. Im such a sad person to think of. So mind me and go try figure something else better to do than sit there reading my post here. Its stupid and unworth while.

To end this post, i would like to say that i miss my sayang a lot. Done something truly stupid yesterday that i am regretting now. Haven't heard from him ever since i started acting like a dweeb. Hoping i would get some news out of him within the hour cause i do really need to hear from him (miss him terribly). "When we have them for ourselves we tend to forget how important they are in our lives but when they ain't there, we will hunt for them like there's no tomorrow". Very sickening don't you think? I am glad i realise the mistake before its too late or before something worst happens. What came to my mind last night? don't ask cause i don't know and don't want to think of it anymore. May all those nightmares just stay as nightmares. Cause to love him and giving up on him the the worst thing that could happen. Losing him is out of the question. I hope he does forgive me.

Wow...i never knew god heard my prayers and applied it so quickly. I finally heard from him before i could finish writing this post. Now im a happy women. Thank you ALLAH.

NiNa